I Live Where?

So many of the blogs I read have the little thingy on the side that tells where the visitors are from. So far today I've been from Aurora, CO ... Lakewood, CO ... Littleton, CO ... and Broomfield, CO ... all of which are NOT WHERE I LIVE. It's not like I'm using a wireless hookup and picking up on someone else's signal. Bizarre.

Shhhh ... What Was That?

About two or three weeks ago I woke up at about 3 or so in the morning. I couldn't go back to sleep. Tossing and turning, I finally got out of bed and decided I'd get some household chores done before going to work.

The chore of my choice? Laundry. Doesn't sound like a big deal ... except we don't have a dryer. We hang all our clothes on the line to dry. So, there I was, in the pitch black darkness of the woods, hanging clothes up to dry. I took the dog out with me, and had him tethered right by me.

Anytime I go out in the early morning hours like that, my ears are very attuned to EVERY LITTLE SOUND. I'm always afraid a Mt. Lion will shoot out of the darkness and try to eat me. This isn't paranoia, this is reality. We have cat attacks on occasion up here, and dogs get picked off like Happy Meals for wild life.

So, there i was, hanging clothes on the line ... SNAP!! I swear I heard a twig break in the darkness. It could be a deer, an elk, or a mt. lion. I freeze, ears pricked ... silence. Nothing. I get back to my chore. Then I hear it ... the very distinct scream of an elk ... screaming, not bugling happily. And it kept screaming ... on and on and on. I grab the basket of clothes and the dog ... and RUN into the house.

Panicking, I wake up my s/o. I explain the whole story, and show her my hands ... they're shaking out of control!! Then, for some reason, I feel like I still need to finish hanging out the clothes. So I ask her to come with me so I won't be alone. She drags herself out of bed to go out with me ... the screaming silenced now ... and explains to me that if an elk was just taken down by a cat, the cat's too busy to be interested in me.

Thanks, honey.

THEN ... last night I got sucked into watching Monster Quest on the History Channel. They had back to back episodes about ... Bigfoot. Of course, one of the episodes goes on and on about how there have been Bigfoot sightings galore in ... COLORADO. They speculate that, since we have the largest elk population in the world, Bigfoot hunts elk ...

The question is ... Would I rather know that it was a cat ... or Bigfoot? I'll never know what happened ... and it probably was a cougar ... but that darned ol' imagination of mine is going CRAZY!!!

Mother's Day

I am a glutton for punishment, I believe. For some reason I thought it would be a good idea to have my mom here for three days to celebrate Mother's Day. I will never do that again!!!

My mother and I do not have a good relationship ... some might even call what I feel "hate" ... I don't know what it is ... I just know that I can't control how I feel and most of our interactions are out of a feeling of obligation on my end.

I want her to leave ... now!!!

Only a few more hours, and I shall be free!!!

Ask The EGGspert

I had a conversation with a friend about eggs. I was telling her how I prefer to buy eggs that come from hens that aren't caged, etc. The problem, for me, is that it's hard to figure out which ones are truly "free range" and which ones aren't technically in cages, but are crammed into tiny rooms with other hens.

Somehow that led to fertilized eggs. I told her I don't buy them because I don't know if the hen and rooster actually "do the deed", or if they've managed a way to commercially inseminate a bunch of hens.

My friend then said ... I swear she really said this ... "Chickens don't have sex, the hen lays the eggs and then the rooster comes and squirts on all the eggs. They're just like frogs, they produce eggs regardless."

What?!?!?

Yes, they lay eggs regardless ... but where the hell does she get her information?? I understand the logic that made her come up with the idea ... but, she spoke with such authority. Like she was the expert! Yeah ...

Why Bother?

I'm awake. It's 3:52 a.m. I've been awake for just over an hour. Why? Because I'm stressing about all the crap I have to do at work. I'm behind because my computer is having some issues and the IT department is supposedly "working on it" ... yeah, right.

It's been two whole days wasted ... ugh!!! The result? I have insomnia because some jerk isn't doing his job!!!

Yesterday morning I sent them an email that said something along the lines of, "I still can't open any word docs, print, use Jenark, or Docuware. I understand you are working on it, but can you give me an approximate timeline in which this problem will be resolved?"

Their response? Oh, you'll love this one ...

"When I figure out the problem, I will contact you for resolution."

WTF??? I'm going to start telling all my clients that when they inquire about when something will be done ... "When I do it." Yeah, that'll go over well.

Firewood, Anyone?

Last weekend we got 36.8" of snow here. As a result, we now have a 60 foot plus tree laying down in our yard. Today I shall go out and begin cutting it up. It never broke at the base, it just leaned over and laid down. During the storm, I went out and knocked snow off it, hoping it would stand up again ... but it did not.

As long as the batteries are still good in the camera, I should be able to get some good shots of the tree to post. I'm not certain anyone wants to see the "progress" I make today, as I don't have a proper saw ... thank goodness the trunk isn't too awful thick. We shall see.

Angry At The Universe

I'm having one of the worst weeks ever! Saturday the 11th of April, my s/o's ex tried to have me subpoenaed ... but I didn't answer the door. Thursday night, the 16th of April, my toy poodle died. He had Addison's disease and went into "Addison's shock". He was at the vet all day on Thursday, and died at home that night. We had a blizzard beginning Friday morning, the 17th. We got snowed in AND had a black out that lasted almost 24 hours. Monday, the 20th was the court date for my s/o to fight the appeal of her ex husband who wants more alimony ... he won. She has to continue paying the deadbeat for another year, at which point I am sure he will appeal again!!

That's all. Isn't it enough? I dare not ask, "What could possibly happen next?" I don't want to know. Hopefully this is our run of shitty luck for the next long while.

But for now, I hate the universe.